How to find your purpose in life and why it’s important.
I felt so lost one day, even though I was living my dream life as a wife, mom, and dental hygienist. I didn’t grow up with a lot of money, so when I started my career, I made more and spent more.
It was nice at first to be able to afford nicer things, but over time, I started living life on autopilot. What once was important to me – brand name clothes, job titles, expensive trips – were not so important anymore.
I remember coming home from a camping trip in Yosemite and the feeling of boredom that soon came afterward when we went back to normal life.
It was a new feeling and I kept shaking it off. But I noticed it lingered long after our trip. I felt it every day and the feeling of guilt that was a result of my feeling of boredom made me feel worse.
I started journaling because I remembered how cool it was to keep a diary when I was a kid and write things that I did on a daily basis. Journaling, along with a few other tools, helped me find my purpose in life and live life with more meaning.
7 simple ways to find your purpose in life.
1. Start a journal.
Journaling keeps a record of what you were thinking and feeling in the moment. The mind can only remember so much before our memories fade and it gets harder to recall exactly when, where, and with whom events happened.
Reading past journal entries will help you see patterns that you wouldn’t have been able to see otherwise. It gives you a glimpse into your exact thoughts, emotions, decisions, and behavior, day in and day out.
You’ll see how far you came, your missteps, and your failures. But you’ll also see people, places, and things that made you laugh, smile, celebrate, and feel like your truest self.
Even if you repeat your patterns, you’ll have your journal to look back on, so that you’re moving in the direction of your truest self and getting comfort, joy, and peace along the way.
If you’ve never journaled before and want to start, here’s exactly what I’d do:
- Find a notebook, pen and a few minutes of undisturbed, quiet time.
- Write the exact date, including the day of the week, at the top of the page.
- Without thinking, write down the first thing that comes to mind.
- Don’t judge or filter your writing.
- Keep writing until you have one line or you feel like you’ve written enough.
- Keep repeating steps 1-5 each day for a week.
- Go back and read what you wrote at the end of a week.
- Make a new entry of any patterns and anything insightful.
You can keep going and even experiment with different lengths and times to journal if you want. The beauty of journaling is that you can always start, stop, and restart any time you need to.
Journaling helped me know who I really was so I could live a life that felt more meaningful and purposeful.
2. Know yourself better.
This seems like a simple task, but many of us don’t actually do this. Getting to know yourself will help you find your purpose because you need to know what you like, what you don’t like, and what makes you tick.
Knowing yourself better will help you connect with yourself on a deeper level. The following questions will help you know yourself better so that you can figure out what gives your life more purpose.
Remember to answer the questions without hesitation so that you get the most honest and authentic answers.
What do I love?
What are my talents?
What are my skills?
What did I want to be as a child?
What are my strengths?
What are my weaknesses?
What are my beliefs?
What are my values?
Where do I see myself in a year?
Where do I see myself in 5 years?
Where do I see myself in 10 years?
3. Follow your bliss.
I remember when I first heard the quote by the late Joseph Campbell on an interview with Bill Moyers:
If you do follow your bliss you put yourself on a kind of track that has been there all the while, waiting for you, and the life that you ought to be living is the one you are living. Follow your bliss and don’t be afraid, and doors will open where you didn’t know they were going to be
After listening to the full interview, I knew that I I had to go on my own hero’s journey to figure out why I felt so lost.
And why I would distract myself with TV, expensive trips, shopping, and endless scrolling through the internet & social media.
I knew that if I didn’t, I would keep living my life on autopilot and life would feel meaningless. So I started following my bliss and it lead me to journaling. because it was something I did as a kid and really enjoyed.
It helped me gain clarity and over time, helped me live a more purposeful life. Like Joseph Campbell said, follow your bliss and you will find the doors that lead to where you belong.
4. Make a list of values.
Your core values are the things that are most important to you. They are shaped by your experiences, how you grew up, the people who raised you, and the things that you believe in.
This is important because aligning your values with your decisions and behaviors can help you live a life that feels more meaningful and purposeful. Here’s a list of examples:
| Altruism Beauty Creativity Determination Education Friendship Gratitude Health Independence Job security Kindness Loyalty Money | Comfort Equality Excitement Security Freedom Happiness Harmony Love Respect Achievement Pleasure Wisdom Peace | Ambition Cleanliness Clarity Courage Honesty Independence Imagination Obedience Responsibility Maturity Restraint Authority Family | Dependability Humility Care Relationship Conformity Dominance Action Perseverance Challenge Health Intellect Capability Fortitude |
You can pick just three and use them to find your purpose in life.
5. Find your Ikigai.
Ikigai is the Japanese term for “reason for living”. It’s a simple system that can help you find your purpose in life by figuring out:
- What you love.
- What you’re good at.
- What the world needs.
- What you can get paid for.
Those 4 areas intersect and in between them are your:
- Passion.
- Mission.
- Vocation.
- Profession.
In the middle is the sweet spot, or your ikigai.
Ikigai diagram
6. Learn to love yourself.
I found that the quickest way to know who you really are is to love yourself, flaws and all. I mentioned earlier that knowing yourself is important in knowing your purpose in life.
Over years, I found that I didn’t have to look far and wide, even though I did, to know the real me. Simply loving the way I think about things, the way I did things, the way I chose things, no matter how small or silly they felt, were who I really was.
I probably could have avoided all the journaling, self-discovery questions, and what not. But I think I had to learn all of those things, too in order to see the patterns, the bigger picture and the real me through the process of elimination.
7. Practice mindfulness.
Mindfulness is a practice that can help you find your purpose in life. When you’re more mindful, you become more aware of who you are, how you think, what you feel, how you behave, and how all of it is tied together.
Mindfulness can help you create more meaning in the everyday moments and things that are already present in your life by bringing your attention to and appreciating all that is in front of you.
I find that almost everything that I do in life to create more peace, joy, and purpose comes back to this, whether it’s journaling, creating more self-awareness through self-discovery, or figuring out my ikigai.
Why it’s important to find your purpose in life.
It’s important to find your purpose in life because having purpose gives life more meaning and studies have shown that it’s important to our health and wellbeing.
1. Predicts greater income and net worth.
People who had a higher sense of purpose had higher levels of income and net worth initially, and were more likely to increase on these financial outcomes over time.
2. Gives you direction.
Having a life with purpose give you a clear sense of where you want to go in life. It’s like having a road map for the destination where you are headed.
3. Greater emotional resilience.
A purpose in life may grant you protection, and help you recover from negative emotional events, resulting in increased resilience to unpleasant emotions.
4. Longer life.
Having a sense of purpose in life is associated with greater longevity & reduced rate of mortality amongst community dwelling older persons.
5. Better health outcomes.
A purpose in life is associated with positive health outcomes, such as less chronic conditions, fewer disabilities, and decreased mortality. Therefore, interventions to improve or maintain higher levels of purpose in life may lead to successful gains over time.
Final thoughts.
I found out that my life felt more purposeful by knowing myself, following my bliss, knowing my values, loving myself, knowing my ikigai, practicing mindfulness, and journaling to reflect on my life and how I changed over time. These were things that I didn’t have to keep consuming in order to feel whole. What gave my life purpose was doing things that I loved, loving myself for who I am, loving the people in my life, spending quality time with others, and bringing my full attention to what’s in front of me with all of my heart.
I hope you found this guide helpful. Please let me know your thoughts!
