What to do when you don't feel like you're good at anything.
"I'm not good at anything." We all experience times as though we're not capable of being good at anything. There are reasons behind this, like being told you're not good at anything and believing it, or constantly comparing yourself to others.
You don't have to be stuck with this limiting belief, however. One of the first steps to overcoming this negative mindset is acknowledging your thoughts and feelings.
When you become aware of what is holding you back, you start to create a shift in your consciousness towards positive change. In this blog post, I'll go over the reasons why we tell ourselves that we're not good at anything and tips to help you feel like a success instead.
CONTENTS
What does it mean when I think that I'm not good at anything?
Other reasons why you might feel like you're not good enough.
How to stop feeling like you're not good at anything.
What are the secrets to success and happiness?
11 powerful tips, to find what you're good at and help you feel like a success.
Conclusion.
What does it mean when I think that I'm not good at anything?
There are many reasons why you may think that you're not good at anything.
Somewhere along the path in your life, someone probably said this to you. Then, you internalized this belief, mistaking it for the truth.
Although it's easy to say, stop believing that you're not good at anything, actually doing it is not, especially if you're conditioned to think this way.
"I'm not going to limit myself just because people won't accept the fact that I can do something else." - Dolly Parton
Other reasons why you might feel like you're not good enough.
Low self-confidence and low self-esteem.
Having low self-confidence and low self-esteem can come from trauma, where you grew up, what you learned from others, and being bullied. You could be conditioned to think that you're not good at anything because of your environment.
Imposter syndrome.
Imposter syndrome is having doubts about your abilities and feeling like you're a fraud. I had this early on in my career as a dental hygienist and it lingered a bit as the years went on, even as my skills improved and I received praise from my patients and colleagues.
Like low self-confidence and low self-esteem, imposter syndrome can come from where you grew up, where you work, and how you are treated by others.
Negative mindset.
A person with a negative mindset can have ruminating thoughts about themselves and convince themselves that they're not good enough.
Comparing yourself to others.
We have access to practically everyone at any time and any place in the world. This makes it easy to compare yourself to others, especially if you're constantly scrolling through your social media feed.
Limiting beliefs.
Limiting beliefs are what you accept as truth about yourself even if it's wrong. This is the inner critic that is constantly engaged in negative self-talk. Here are some examples of limiting beliefs:
- I am too old.
- I am too young.
- I don't have enough education.
- My skills are terrible.
- I am not smart enough.
How to stop feeling like you're not good at anything.
Now that you have an idea why you would think this way, let's go over how to overcome this mindset.
Everyone has something that they're good at. If you've lived long enough, chances are, you picked up something along the way and became really good at it.
You need to start recognizing what you're good at because the world needs your gifts and you have something to contribute to it.
Knowing what you're good at is a great first step to feeling successful and happier in life.
"Know what sparks the light in you, so that you, in your own way, can illuminate the world." - Oprah Winfrey
What are the secrets to success and happiness?
We all want happiness and success. But we can sabotage ourselves if we think that other people are happier and more successful than us.
Is this really true, though? Some people may appear happy, but we don't know what's really going on inside their heads or their personal spaces.
People that have money and influence may look successful to us. But these measurements of success are too narrow. Sure, it's nice to have money and influence, but people that have this also have problems in their own lives that have nothing to do with success and happiness.
This is why you have to define what success and happiness mean to you if you want to be good at anything in life. You want to be good at something that gives you meaning and purpose if you want genuine and lasting happiness and success.
There really aren't any secrets when it comes to being happy and successful. It takes work, time, and effort to achieve the level of success and happiness that you want.
This might seem overwhelming to you, which is why I have a few tips that will help you get there if you are willing to put in the time and effort yourself so you can stop believing that you are not good at anything.
9 powerful tips to find what you're good at and help you feel like a success.
1. Find your passions and purpose in life.
What your purpose in life is.
Your purpose in life is the reason behind most of the things you do in your life. It is the reason why you got up this morning and the thing that motivates & inspires you to go the distance even when you're faced with a challenge.
Why your passions and purpose in life are important.
Your passions and purpose in life are important to living a life that is meaningful to you and can even have an impact on your health and happiness. Research has shown that having a purpose in life, or PIL, "appears to be biologically wired into our thinking and necessary for optimal health, a feature of our brain that defines each of us individually and simultaneously is a unique characteristic of the human condition."
Questions to ask yourself to find your passions and purpose in life.
- What are my values?
- What are my beliefs?
- What do I love?
- What do I stand for?
- What is my dream career?
- Who do I admire?
- If time and money were no object, what would I do?
2. Stop comparing yourself to others.
Comparison is the thief of joy, and social media has become one of its biggest accomplices. It's that feeling you get when you're scrolling through your social media feed, you see the highlights of other people's lives and you judge yourself for not being able to keep up or having the same experience.
It can be hard to break away from this because of the fear of missing out, or FOMO. What you can practice instead is JOMO or the joy of missing out. You don't have to constantly check your family and friends' daily activities on social media. In fact, I would recommend doing a digital detox, which is unplugging from all of your digital devices for a certain period of time.
It doesn't have to be a ver long period of time. It can last just a day so you can reset and reconnect with yourself. Reconnecting with yourself can help you figure out what it is you're good at.
3. Let go of limiting beliefs.
If you want to know what you're good at, you have to let go of your limiting beliefs. As I discussed earlier, your limiting beliefs are the negative thoughts that hold you back in life. They keep you from reaching your full potential because you become fearful of what might happen.
You have to identify what they are first if you want to let go of your limiting beliefs (I gave examples of limiting beliefs in the previous section). Then you can create new, empowering beliefs to replace the old, limiting beliefs.
4. Look back at your life.
Taking a good look at your past can help you identify what you're good at. Schedule some time for yourself to reflect on your past successes. Write down all of your achievements and accomplishments.
You can also reflect on the times you were in the zone. What have you done in the past that made you forget to eat or use the bathroom? When did you feel like life was flowing with little effort?
5. Ask others what you're good at.
If you don't know where to start looking for what you are good at, you can ask other people. Sometimes people can give you insight into something that you're good at that you're not aware of.
These can be your family members, your friends, colleagues, teachers, mentors, and pretty much anyone that knows you well.
6. Practice self-compassion.
One of the things that can prevent you from progressing in life is constantly thinking, "I'm not good at anything." This is where the practice of self-compassion can be helpful.
Self-compassion allows you to accept yourself for who you are. One simple way to do this is to do an act of kindness for yourself. It doesn't have to be big. It can be as simple as telling yourself how good you are and really connecting with it.
7. Get out of your comfort zone.
Being in your comfort zone is fine if you are doing certain repetitive tasks or you're recovering from something. But if you want to start improving your life, you have to get out of your comfort zone.
If you ever wanted to try something new but were afraid to in the past, then moving out of your comfort zone can help. It doesn't have to be something dramatic. In fact, I recommend starting small.
Having a small win makes you feel successful, builds self-confidence, and makes you want to keep moving forward.
8. Make a list of your strengths.
Chances are, there is something that you're already good at, so making a list of your strengths will help you identify what they are. Remember that a perceived weakness can mask an inner strength that can't be easily seen.
For example, you might be quiet, and other people might perceive it as a weakness. However, you could also be a great listener, a quality that can be very powerful.
You also want to explore what your weaknesses are because they might be areas that you can improve on and may be valuable later on.
9. Embrace imperfection.
You want to embrace the idea of imperfection because it allows you to fully accept yourself, flaws and all. Knowing what your limits are can sometimes be more productive than constantly forcing yourself to find out what you're good at and feeling frustrated as a result.
One simple way to do this is an ancient Japanese practice called Wabi Sabi. Wabi Sabi is the practice of embracing imperfection and impermanence.
It allows you to become aware of, and appreciate, the beauty of change and being in the present moment. One way to do this is to drink your tea slowly because it allows you to focus on what is right in front of you. If tea's not your thing, you can substitute it with your favorite drink or food.
"I would like to be remembered as someone who used whatever talent she had to do her work to the very best of her ability." - Ruth Bader Ginsburg
Conclusion.
You have so much potential to be good at anything that you put your mind to. It's easy to tell someone to "stop thinking that you're not good at anything." But to put it into practice is not.
The reason why it's hard for some of us to accept this as the truth is that it becomes so ingrained in us in different ways. Like the way we were raised, our socioeconomic background, our race, gender, and so on and so forth.
It takes time and effort to overcome the limiting beliefs that keep us from becoming good at anything, but there are simple practices that you can do everyday, like self-compassion, making a list of what you're already good at, finding your passions, and discovering what your purpose in life is.
I hope you found these tips helpful. If you have any suggestions or comments, please let me know down below!