Shadow work is simply confronting the side of you that is kept hidden from yourself & others and there is nothing wrong with having one. It’s when you identify with your shadow and label yourself as such that it becomes a problem.
I’m going to share with you what it is, my experience with it, and what you can do to get it started so you can use it as a tool for healing.
What Shadow Work Is.
The idea of shadow work began with psychotherapist Carl Jung. Without getting too technical, shadow work is at its core, the practice of becoming aware of your inner darkness, hence the word shadow.
Think of it as bringing to light:
- feelings you don’t want to feel
- stories you’re afraid are true
- behaviors you choose to ignore
- parts of yourself you think are “too much” or “not enough”
These pieces don’t disappear. They just move into the shadows, or your subconscious, waiting for you to acknowledge them.
My Experience With Shadow Work.
You might have heard about shadow work from a very popular book called The Shadow Work Journal by Keila Shaheen or seen TikTok videos about it if you’re into wellness.
I admit that the first time I learned about it was when I did some research on it for a blog post. I found it fascinating because I’d never heard about it before but learned that the practice was something that I was already doing throughout my soul searching journey.
Over the years, I learned that shadow work is simple in concept but hard in practice. Being aware of your shadow is pretty straightforward.
You bring it into your consciousness and something follows. That something is usually a feeling or thought that is brought on by whatever it was that made you uncomfortable in the first place.
For example, I took my dog for a walk one morning and forgot to bring plastic poop bags. He pooped on someone’s lawn and I reached for bags on his leash where they were usually kept but found nothing.
I immediately felt guilt and embarrassment because I was kind of far from my house and couldn’t go back home right away to grab the plastic bags and clean up the mess.
Instead, I looked around to see if anyone saw me, ducked my head, and proceeded to walk away as quickly as I could with my pug in tow. I became that person that I chastised in my head for leaving their dog’s feces on the ground.
I felt guilty & embarrassed but I didn’t identify with those feelings. Old me would have blown the act out of proportion and labeled myself as bad.
The same thing happens when we do, think, or believe something bad about ourselves. We identify with the bad things and label ourselves as such.
Then we hide it from our consciousness and keep it there until we let ourselves bring them back into the light.
The new me knew better than to push my feelings down. I knew that if I let that happen, I would label myself as bad. I would have kept repeating this pattern with different situations.
The shadows would have continued to build up inside until I let myself face them so I could process them and let them go.
This is why shadow work is hard in practice. You have to face the parts of you that make you very uncomfortable.
The process is not linear either. It can sometimes feel like you’re going around in a never ending loop of bad feelings, thoughts, and behavior you’ve experienced in your life.
But if you’re tired of feeling stuck, you need to keep pulling your shadows out of the darkness and into the light.
I found that it’s an ongoing process because your consciousness is like a pipeline. The shadows are the things that can clog it up and cause problems if they stay stuck inside.
Shadow work is the tool that keeps the pipes clean. You’ll always think, feel and do things that are “bad”.
When you bring your shadows to light, you keep those pipes flowing and operating like they should.
You accept your shadows for what they are, understand why you have them, let them go when you’re ready, and start healing.
How To Start Shadow Work.
I started shadow work before I ever began researching it for a blog post on shadow work journal prompts.
Here it is, step-by-step, so you can start your own journey as soon as you’re ready.
1. Meditate.
Meditation helps you train your mind to separate your thoughts, feelings, and actions from each other and see them for what they really are. You can do this with just 5 minutes a day. I have a free guided meditation you can download to help you start or continue your own daily practice.
2. Become More Self-Aware.
Self-awareness is acknowledging your thoughts, feelings, and actions without attaching any judgement or criticism to them. It’s also known as mindfulness. The more self-aware you are, the better you are at catching yourself when you judge or criticize yourself for your shadows.
3. Accept & Understand Your Shadows.
Acceptance and understanding go hand in hand when it comes to shadow work. Once you let yourself face your shadows, you become more accepting of them and process them better. You understand where they come from, why you have them, and how they affect your thoughts, feelings, and actions.
4. Love Yourself Unconditionally.
When you fully accept and understand your shadows, you love yourself unconditionally, good and bad. You need & crave approval & validation from others less & less over time and are able to catch yourself when you notice it happening. You start to live a life that feels more meaningful and focus more on the things that are most important to you.
30 Shadow Work Prompts To Gently Face Your Shadows.
Shadow work is not easy. So here’s a month’s work of shadow work prompts to start your journey in a way that feels gentle and nurturing.
- Which emotion could use a little extra warmth from me today?
- What recent moment is inviting me to understand myself better?
- Which part of me that feels “a lot” is ready for kindness?
- Which “not enough” feeling could use a soft reminder of my worth?
- When did I judge myself recently, and how can I offer grace instead?
- What honest truth about myself feels ready to be seen gently?
- What repeating habit is giving me a chance to grow with ease?
- What memory is nudging me toward gentle reflection today?
- When do I hold back my feelings, and how can I feel more at ease?
- Which past version of me deserves a little comfort today?
- What qualities I notice in others might also live within me?
- Which old belief feels heavy and ready to be softened?
- What would feel good about allowing myself to be more open?
- When did I learn to quiet myself, and how can I brighten again?
- What need within me is asking for care and attention?
- Which emotion is guiding me toward deeper understanding?
- What familiar pattern shows up when life feels full, and how can I soothe it?
- What makes me doubt myself, and what kinder thought feels true?
- Which past moment can I now meet with comfort and gentleness?
- What part of me wants to be shared more freely?
- What do I avoid that might feel okay to explore slowly now?
- Which old habit is ready to be appreciated and released?
- When did I respond strongly to something, and what message was underneath?
- What old need am I finally ready to give myself?
- What belief about being “good” can I rewrite in a caring way?
- What am I resisting that might feel easier with a softer approach?
- What part of me is ready for calm acceptance today?
- What inner voice wants gentle support so I can speak openly?
- What do I hold onto that deserves kindness and release?
- What could feel lighter if I allowed myself to set it down?
You can dive deeper into shadow work by reading the shadow work journal blog post or downloading the worksheets for free by clicking here or filling the shadow work journal form below:
Last Thoughts On Shadow Work.
Shadow work is more than confronting the hidden parts of yourself. It’s a tool to help you accept and understand all parts of you, good and bad, so you can love yourself exactly as you are, stop craving the approval of others, stop focusing on things that don’t matter, and start doing things that are truly important to you. I hope these tips helped you understand how important shadow is and start a shadow work journey of your own. Let me know what you think in the comments!
